I find solace in the kitchen. When I’m feeling sad or angry or just in need of comfort, baking is almost like a hug to me. In the kitchen, I’m in control of things. I measure the ingredients in exact proportions. I preheat the oven to a specific temperature. I set the timer and once it goes off, whatever I put in the oven is now ready to be taken out. I take a bite, and somehow—even for just a little while—I forget that we’re currently in the midst of a pandemic.
The past 3 weeks have been filled with a lot of feelings: anger, worry, loneliness, disappointment. It’s hard not to give into those feelings and “stay positive” because the reality is, not everyone is privileged to stay home to flatten the curve. Not everyone gets to eat 3 meals a day and settle into a comfy bed at the end of the day. Sometimes, I ask myself how much is enough help? Is keeping your rage to yourself instead of voicing it out a good thing? If you speak up and some people think you’re much better off finding other ways to channeling that energy, does it make it wrong? It’s such a confusing time that makes you feel useless sometimes. Or is that just me?
So, I go back to my safe space. In the kitchen, baking. My good friend and former boss Ines messaged me last night and asked me if I wanted to bake cookies for doctors. She had a friend who was collecting “happy food” for frontliners because some of the doctors expressed they wanted sweets. I said I don’t know if I have enough supplies but I might be able to make some brownie cookies. Two dozens maybe, was that enough? She said anything I could give was fine. I woke up this morning, excited to make cookies.
I messaged her after I was done to tell her I was able to make 3 dozens of mini brownie cookies and they were ready for pickup. I was already feeling loads better from the previous day. Her friend is from Lawyers for Doctors, a group of lawyers consolidating efforts to purchase PPEs, hospital gowns, masks, and food for frontliners. I don’t have the means or supplies to feed 100 people but I hope these cookies will brighten their day somehow and fuel them through this.
If you’re looking to make good use of your kitchen during this time and have some supplies to spare, send them a message on Facebook or Instagram. They’ll contact you to arrange for pickup of your donation and they’ll also take care of delivering them to the hospitals. Because if anyone needs happy food, it’s these brave people battling the disease head-on.